Wow... Kinda Crazy Lemme Tell Ya...

I was an emotional roller coaster yesterday... I was really close to breaking up with Stephen. I guess he was afraid and scared because he told me he didn't want to lose me. Last night he came to the house around 2:30am... I had spoken with him about what needs to happen and what I want because I was so sick and tired of these stupid arguments that we have. I despise them; I hate crying. I seriously was just trying to find time to spend with him because our schedules were so busy and hectic. Whenever I'm having a discussion with him about something, if he didn't want to talk about it, he would cut me off. It would make me angry. He would use the excuse of, "Ok, I'm going to bed. Love you, bye." It was short and after we get off the phone, I feel like I'm left in the gutter thinking to myself, "Ok, what just happened?" I told him I don't know what else to do anymore. I told him I wanted trust, honesty, and most importantly, I want our communication to be better. Text messaging is so impersonal and that's what we do most of the time. I don't see/hear how he's feeling and he doesn't see/hear how I'm feeling. Sometimes I hate text messaging and a person can't just assume someone's feelings when they text message. There was one day where Stephen told me I was having an attitude about something through text, and I was like, "Um, heck no! I was being rational." Hopefully now, everything gets through this time... I don't know if I can deal with another episode like this one.